It was twenty years ago. At that time, I was working as a psychotherapist only for individuals, not for companies. I had a client an Australian businessman with who we managed to improve and fix his personal problems and phobias. At one point, however, he wanted me to do more than eliminate more than his fear of flying.
"My company is not making money. Please, I need help otherwise it just doesn't make sense. " Many branches across Australia mean even more work and problems.
I told him: "I'm not a business consultant" but he told me: "I know that you can help me"
And we did it. The man has much happier personal life, and his company is striving -it gives him more than he takes. These are different things as everybody is saying personal life and work - let's not mix it, it would probably be easy, but they mix with each other without us wanting to
I am single and l don’t like that. I want to be in a relationship.
Does our past affect us today?
Imagine scenario: couple with 2 small children. Finally, free evening planning candlelight dinner. Exited wife is cooking dinner. Husband with flower is coming home a few min late. He is expecting nice worm welcome. But instead...
"You're late! Where have you been? You're unfaithful to me!” shouts his wife.
He is wearing a yellow jumper. Is it a problem? Normally no! But in our case: His wife was beaten by her dad. Why? She got home late at age 6. And her dad had worn then yellow T-shirt.
Our brain is trying “to protect us”. But it cannot differentiate past from present. That is why the wife has reacted as she did. The reaction was unconscious based on her past.
The wife’s reaction unfortunately also evokes unpleasant childhood memories for her husband. He lived in a family where his mother was constantly accusing his father of cheating.
You can imagine how such evening has turned out. YES, infamously and by quarrel. Unfortunately, our past affects us a lot. And we are not aware of it most of the time!
When l am working with clients we reveal and release these experiences. So our life in present is not spoilt anymore.
Successful young business owner
So far, she was focusing on offering services for big corporate companies, but that has changed with Covid. So, she started to offer different type of services to Universities and also developed new software.
And the challenge? “Should l stay and continue to work on my “baby”? Which I have built up from nothing, and which has supported me successfully for last 7 years or should I focus more on the new type of business? Can l believe it will support me financially, will it be successful?” What we did? We looked the numbers – looked at profitability of these different sectors, but we also covered fear of unknown and sadness from letting go of her “baby”.
Results? My client has opened to new options and is at ease with it, new customers are coming globally. And of course, we have set up also new pricing – much more money and at the same time less working hours.
My second business client?
80 hours of work per week.
We started with finances and numbers. We calculated that her salary was 6$ an hour. Even at that time, it was less than the minimum wage /12$/. Who can be surprised that this was reflected in her personal life?
So much for the connection between psychotherapy and economic numbers. Yes, in order to change the nature of her business, she had to change herself. It meant using body-psychotherapy, that is, working not only with her thoughts and mental settings, but also with their physical manifestations. At the same time, change in the relationship settings in her company followed.
"Do I want a business?" Yes. But l want to work less and earn more. "
We put this decision into practice together. And it affected business and life as a whole. Yes, if you ask, she also lost a lot of weight.
In some cases, it’s good to work with the whole family. I mean They brought me thein child since it was having troubles in a school. You know though typical troubles bad concentration, bad behaviour, being often ill. Well how shall help with that when there is a trauma of child its grandparents when its mother is very unhappy and unsatisfied with herself and her father is overloaded with work and always tired? Could you expect healthy and happy child in this family? Could you make it happy and not change mothers’ attitude towards herself and fathers daily schedule? Perhaps you can but l am not almighty. It did work but l did help they are quite happy family now. But they have done the most important thing themselves. They wanted to be helped.